For decades, it’s been an unspoken rule that celebrities are expected to be friendly and approachable in public — but lately, we’ve seen a shift in stars dropping the facade when their boundaries are crossed.
Take Jason Kelce. The typically affable former NFL player shocked his loyal following in November 2024 when he used the f-slur during a heated confrontation with a heckler who was following him and had used the same slur to insult his brother, Travis Kelce.
The dad of three, 37, isn’t the only star who’s lost their cool when provoked. In June 2024, footage circulated of Lana Del Rey clashing with a group of people following her and her family in Paris. (She later allegedly claimed on social media that they were “stalkers” who told her they’d try to “make me look bad.”)
There’s no argument that — to borrow from Jason’s subsequent apology — to “greet hate with hate” is entirely unacceptable. Still, these incidents have inspired an important conversation about the expectations of public figures’ reactions when their personal space is violated.
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With fan culture (and criticism) reaching new heights in today’s social media–driven society, it’s no wonder stars are getting tired of keeping up appearances.
“[A fan] may see a public figure as not being human in the same way they are — they may rather view them as larger than life, not ‘real’, and not empathize with being violated,” Dr. Gail Saltz, associate professor of psychiatry at the New York-Presbyterian Hospital Weill Cornell School of Medicine, told Us. Alternatively, “Their envy of the celebrity who seems to have it all could drive their being aggressive and feeling entitled to act in whatever way they choose.”
Feeling entitled to a star’s attention is not only misguided but can also lead to negative interactions. “Sometimes a celebrity is pushed to assert boundaries because others are threatening, disrespectful, hurtful, attacking or dangerous,” Saltz shared. That may just be what the person who is doing the provoking is hoping for: “Negative attention is deemed better than no attention at all to someone who craves the attention.”
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It’s easy to dismiss a celebrity who lashes out in public as selfish or difficult, but sometimes, they’ve simply reached their limit. “This tends to occur when there are a combination of emotional, psychological and situational factors at play,” licensed clinical professional counselor Anne M. Appel told Us, pointing to stress, burnout and fatigue as factors. “Ideally, they’d respond in a calm and composed way — however, just like all people, they can get pushed to a ‘breaking point’ and may react in a less than ideal way publicly.”
This could explain the April 2024 video of Alec Baldwin allegedly hitting a cell phone out of a stranger’s hand. In reality, the individual had been berating him for several moments — going so far as to ask an offensive question about the victim of the fatal 2021 Rust shooting — before he reacted.
Setting limits is “absolutely reasonable,” says Appel, who encourages celebrities to communicate their expectations “clearly and directly.”
But is it bad business for a household name to show their less-than-shiny sides, like when Chappell Roan received mixed reactions for publicly confronting photographers on two separate occasions? According to Robbie Vorhaus, founder of PR/media company Vorhaus Communications, Inc., it depends on the context.
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“The issue of celebrities having their boundaries crossed is complex because public visibility is inherently part of their profession,” he told Us. “However, this doesn’t justify harassment or invasion of personal space.”
Paparazzi are known to invade celebrities’ personal space. For example, Tom Holland was filmed allegedly pushing away a photographer who got a little too close to his now-fiancée, Zendaya, in October 2024 — but it’s unlikely the incident will resonate when it involves his flawless reputation.
“If a celebrity’s response appears justified, it rarely causes lasting career damage,” Vorhaus explained. Still, “We advise clients to establish clear boundaries while remaining professional, as a recorded outburst can overshadow the initial provocation.”
Chris Vlasto, cofounder of crisis communications firm Haven Strategies, agrees these incidents don’t have long-term effects, noting that for those who’ve had public scuffles with paparazzi, “All of the instances are replayed for decades but in the end, their audiences don’t care. The battles are meaningless and the fans are sympathetic.”
The takeaway? The Golden Rule — do unto others as you would have them do unto you — still applies when you’re dealing with those in the spotlight. A little empathy goes a long way, so remember there’s always more to the story, and that stars really are just like Us: They have good days and bad days too.
