As Ben Higgins gears up for his new journey of fatherhood, the former Bachelor star admitted he’s “terrified” to be a girl dad with wife Jessica Clarke.
“With a girl, there’s 1000 worst case scenarios in my mind and I know she’s gonna break my heart,” Higgins, 35, told Us Weekly exclusively on Monday, August 19, ahead of The Famously Average Golf Tournament hosted by iHeartRadio’s The Ben & Ashley I Almost Famous Podcast. “She’s gonna break [my heart] because it’s so full.”
Higgins recalled “watching a show” recently and “two little girls” ran up to their dad who had just come home from war.
“I can’t imagine walking in the door and seeing my little girl run up to me and be like, ‘Dad, you’re home.’ That just crushes me, and it excites me, and it makes me feel everything,” he said. “I know I’m going to feel everything and that’s what’s so worrisome for me is what it’s going to do to me.”
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Higgins is worried he’ll become “a pile of tears and mush forever” when being a dad.
“It’s literally been a joke in my family,” he said. “I’ve always been really sensitive and not in a good way. Always. I’m very emotional. I’m a crier.”
Higgins and Clarke, 29, announced on Sunday, August 18, that they are expecting their first baby together after two years of marriage.
“We planned this, and we didn’t know how many steps we’d have to take. We didn’t know how much help we’d have to get,” Higgins told Us, revealing that they went through intrauterine insemination (IUI) before Clarke got pregnant. “We have a lot of friends who struggle with infertility and who struggled through the process and just hearing from them and learning from them, we knew we wanted to plan and be ready. … We set that date and we started trying, and it happened for us easier than we expected.”
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Higgins said he and Clarke “feel really fortunate” and are “really excited” to start this next chapter of their relationship.
The Bachelor Nation alum gushed over seeing his wife’s “mama bear instincts” kick in already. Higgins noted Clarke “doesn’t feel great ever” but has kept a positive attitude throughout the pregnancy.
“She is still in a good mood and looks at it as a gift and a blessing that she’s pregnant,” he explained. “It’s such a crazy thing because if I was pregnant, I would never be able to do it. So, to see her just have this spirit of gratefulness through the whole thing has been really educational for me. I’ve learned a lot from her.”
While they’re keeping their daughter’s name under wraps for now, Higgins did share that he and Clarke are planning to have a Winnie the Pooh themed nursery.
“Her design, my handywork,” he told Us. “We both love Winnie the Pooh. Actually in our vows, we had two of my best friends from home read Winnie the Pooh sayings during our wedding.”
Reporting by Lanae Brody
