Melinda Gates made rare comments about how her mental health deteriorated amid her split from Bill Gates.
While promoting her new book, The Next Day, Melinda, 60, acknowledged the “difficult periods” with Bill, 69, that led up to her decision to part ways. She started having “nightmares” of a beautiful house collapsing around her in 2019.
“As dramatic as it sounds,” she wrote in an excerpt, according to People. “I knew, in that moment, that I was going to have to make a decision — and that I was going to have to make it by myself.”
Melinda sat Bill down at the beginning of 2020 to ask for a separation. By summer of that same year, Melinda requested that they officially file for divorce. “Bill has publicly acknowledged that he wasn’t always faithful to me,” she wrote in her book as one of the reasons for the breakup.
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According to Melinda, her struggles got worse after calling it quits. “Bill has a reputation for being one of the toughest negotiators in the world,” she recalled, adding that she “started having panic attacks.”
Melinda and Bill went public with the split in May 2021.
“After a great deal of thought and a lot of work on our relationship, we have made the decision to end our marriage,” they wrote in a joint statement while referring to the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation. “Over the last 27 years, we have raised three incredible children and built a foundation that works all over the world to enable all people to lead healthy, productive lives.”
The statement concluded: “We continue to share a belief in that mission and will continue our work together at the foundation, but we no longer believe we can grow together as a couple in this next phase of our lives. We ask for space and privacy for our family as we begin to navigate this new life.”
The pair’s divorce was finalized in August 2021.. Melinda has since opened up about what led to the end of their marriage.
“It wasn’t one moment or one specific thing that happened,” she told CBS Mornings in March 2022. “There just came a point in time where there was enough there that I realized it just wasn’t healthy and I couldn’t trust what we had.”
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Bill weighed in on Melinda’s comments two months later, sharing on Today, “This was a very tough thing. We had a lot of amazing things in our marriage. The kids, the foundation, the enjoyment we had. And so it’s a very hard adjustment. I know divorces are different, but it’s just a complete change. We were partners, we kind of grew up together, and now that’s different. We’re not married.”
The billionaire explained how he and Melinda were able to move forward after their split.
“The divorce is definitely a sad thing. I have responsibility for causing a lot of pain to my family. It was a tough year. I feel good that all of us are moving forward now,” he continued. “I certainly made mistakes and I take responsibility. I don’t think delving into the particulars at this point is constructive, but yes I caused pain and I feel terrible about that.”
In excerpts from her book, Melinda recalled how her inner voice had faded “in the decade or so before my marriage fell apart.” She credited therapy for making it “possible for me to respond to the betrayals in my marriage without betraying myself in return.”
