From 2005 to 2010, Kendra Wilkinson was known as one of the Girls Next Door, three blonde bombshells sharing a glimpse into life at the famed Playboy Mansion. But for the reality star, it’s been difficult to shake comparisons to who she was — and what she looked like — nearly two decades ago.
“I was living my life and enjoying my 20s, being skinny and [a] party girl. I didn’t realize I was setting myself up for this unrealistic expectation in my 30s,” Wilkinson, 39, tells Us. “I feel like society needs me to stay the girl they once knew.”
However, as she approaches her 40th birthday this June, the mom of two (she and ex Hank Baskett share son Hank IV, 15, and daughter Alijah, 10) is proud to be embracing herself in every form. She’s also done with strangers sharing their unsolicited opinions: On January 12, the Kendra Sells Hollywood alum slammed critics attacking her looks, declaring on Instagram, “For those of you hating on my new weight [and] 40 yr old face, please know that I’m happy, healthy and at peace in life finally.”
Most importantly, “I’m becoming the woman I want to be,” she tells Us. “I feel free, to be honest.”
Kendra Wilkinson Thanks Fans For ‘Positive Comments’ About Weight Gain
Here, Wilkinson talks ushering in a new era.
What inspired you to address body-shamers on Instagram?
It’s important to highlight these things. I see a lot of ageism [and] a lot of body-shaming, and it’s not right. We’re human. People are getting mad at women for aging [or] gaining a pound. It’s unfortunate we have to feel [like] we have to be 25 [years old] and a size zero forever. I’m unapologetically me at all times, and I have the confidence to rise above it and to be comfortable in my own skin. This is about embracing life now.
Was there a moment you prioritized self-confidence?
This past year, I’ve been working really hard on myself. Before that, I [was] struggling with life through divorce, depression and mental health. I’ve been through absolute hell — my 30s were a mess — and [I] thank God I hit that rock bottom because the only way to go is up. I finally did the proper work to get to that point of confidence. Before, I was self-sabotaging and living in regret and shame, so even though I was skinny and fit, [that] doesn’t mean I was necessarily happy. Now that I’ve gained a couple of pounds, I feel confident. I feel great about myself. This is the first time in a long time I want to prance around in a bathing suit with everybody watching.
What was behind your mental health struggles?
Divorce definitely knocked me down to the ground, and then things spiraled out of control. I had to embrace life as a single mom. [Hank] is a great dad, but on my side, I’m alone, so I’ve had to go through the regret of the past by myself. I lived in a deep depression for years and it was a battle. Finally, I went through a psychotic breakdown, and I had to be hospitalized. It was the darkest point of my life. I had to recover.
How are you maintaining a healthy lifestyle now?
I had [to] focus on a realistic mindset and how to improve my thoughts. Self-care is so important. [I also do] journaling, and I’m on medication, which probably has something to do with my weight gain. The doctor did try to prescribe me Ozempic and I said no to it. What I’m doing [instead] is cooking. I’m going to cook more using good oils, but I’m not going to go on any crazy diet.
Have you reconciled with your Playboy past?
I still have setbacks when it comes to why I did Playboy or why I moved in [to the Playboy Mansion] at 18. I do signings and most of the pictures are Playboy photos. A year ago, I was crying. I was like, “Oh my God, this is not me anymore.” I was so mad at myself and the world. I felt trapped in this Playboy image. It’s too much pressure and you don’t know how to fight it mentally. Honestly, it’s about thinking positively. I live authentically and I’ve finally stepped into that place for the first time since Girls Next Door.
Kendra Wilkinson Through the Years: From Playboy Playmate to Full-Time Mom
Are you looking for love?
I’ve been on the Raya dating app waiting list for almost five years. Am I happy as f— right now being alone? F— yeah. I actually like my freedom and I have boy toys here and there. Do I want to find love again? Sure, yeah. I’m open to it, but at the moment, I like my freedom.
How’s your headspace as you enter your 40s? What’s next for you?
I’m still in real estate right now and doing a great job. Things are looking up. I feel blessed. I couldn’t be happier going into my 40s. I’m so proud of all the obstacles I’ve overcome, and my kids are happy. I feel confident I will find love again [and] let me tell you, my weight gain ain’t stopping the hottest guys [from] coming at me. The best version of Kendra is here right now.
For more on Wilkinson, pick up the latest issue of Us Weekly, on stands now.
